is a tender and fiery affair.
all things in their time under heaven: this is sovereignty.
true reconciliation is as simple as grace.
relationship is not ownership.
"seek ye first" and "all shall be added;" including perfect, covering righteousness.
to soar in love; and yet fresh!
and madness yet continues..
29.10.07
just parametrize your ignorance
you've got to know what you don't know. call it "lambda." whatever. anyway, someone should tell that to james lovelock:
---
it used to be that scientists upheld honest epistemology; instead of adopting the modus operandi of your typical social theorist.
meh; saying "we actually don't have a clue" just doesn't make as good a headline.
---
lumberjack's law: "anything bad that cannot be directly linked to george w. bush will be blamed on global warming."
in other news, the world will cease to function if we solve world hunger. gaia will not be pleased.Prof Lovelock will say in a lecture to the Royal Society: "Any economic downturn or planned cutback in fossil fuel use, which lessened aerosol density, would intensify the heating.
"If there were a 100 per cent cut in fossil fuel combustion it might get hotter not cooler. We live in a fool's climate. We are damned if we continue to burn fuel and damned if we stop too suddenly."
---
it used to be that scientists upheld honest epistemology; instead of adopting the modus operandi of your typical social theorist.
meh; saying "we actually don't have a clue" just doesn't make as good a headline.
---
lumberjack's law: "anything bad that cannot be directly linked to george w. bush will be blamed on global warming."
20.10.07
brief update
alrighty, so life is exceedingly full at the moment. but a brief synopsis of current events/thoughts is good:
1. the upcoming week shall be named 'chaos.' it will include the following:
- preparation for a journal club talk (type iib sugra compactified on ads5 x s5; ooooohhhh =p)
- the delivery of said talk.
- production of center of charge plots for massless diffusion in the N=4 sym plasma as produced from ads/cft with (D7/D3) massless flavour.
- [hopefully] the production of actual charge density plots for the same. or at least the beginning/middle of this.
2. consequently, this week is rather shot to hell. however, I will make myself available sunday afternoon/evening for spending time with folks. that includes church and post-church monkage.
3. after this week, I'll be heading out to s/v for the halloween retreat. sheena will probably be coming as well. :) glorious!
4. family stuff has stabilized by the grace of God. thank you for your prayer. 'the prayer of a righteous man availeth much.'
5. the Gospel is hard. I think I've spent a lot of time over the past few years thinking/meditating on complicated things in Christianity instead of on these simple facts: forgiveness is hard; praying for your enemies is hard; walking the extra mile is hard; confession and repentance are hard; giving up expectations for myself [and others] is hard; trusting in His provision every day is hard; casting aside anxiety and self-torment is hard; &c.
6. I apologize for being sequestered primarily over the past month. it's been a busy/quasi-traumatic season with family/school stuff.
7. for a long time (and especially after the hell I put rachel through), I've been concerned with my self-conception and self-awareness of love. in other words, [until recently] every time I thought I was falling in love or love was awakened in my heart, I was fooling myself. the image was present without the substance. and so I suffered (from my own hand) anxiety on whether I would ever know the truth of love in my heart.
I think I can report that my anxiety was an intellectual/academic exercise that existed not because my heart was deficient, but simply because I had never fallen in love.
I can say that now because both sheena and I believe that we are falling in love with each other. I find myself hesitant to say how deep or substantive that love is, but this one thing I believe firmly: that we are presently in the act of falling in love, and that deeply. how deep and how substantive I don't think we can say for some time, nor is it important that we have an answer to that. the matter is simple and clear: love from the Source of Love is alive and growing between us, and we trust to His timing for how that grows and deepens. yes!
ok; to the grindstone. [how's that for a transition?]
'madness!'
1. the upcoming week shall be named 'chaos.' it will include the following:
- preparation for a journal club talk (type iib sugra compactified on ads5 x s5; ooooohhhh =p)
- the delivery of said talk.
- production of center of charge plots for massless diffusion in the N=4 sym plasma as produced from ads/cft with (D7/D3) massless flavour.
- [hopefully] the production of actual charge density plots for the same. or at least the beginning/middle of this.
2. consequently, this week is rather shot to hell. however, I will make myself available sunday afternoon/evening for spending time with folks. that includes church and post-church monkage.
3. after this week, I'll be heading out to s/v for the halloween retreat. sheena will probably be coming as well. :) glorious!
4. family stuff has stabilized by the grace of God. thank you for your prayer. 'the prayer of a righteous man availeth much.'
5. the Gospel is hard. I think I've spent a lot of time over the past few years thinking/meditating on complicated things in Christianity instead of on these simple facts: forgiveness is hard; praying for your enemies is hard; walking the extra mile is hard; confession and repentance are hard; giving up expectations for myself [and others] is hard; trusting in His provision every day is hard; casting aside anxiety and self-torment is hard; &c.
6. I apologize for being sequestered primarily over the past month. it's been a busy/quasi-traumatic season with family/school stuff.
7. for a long time (and especially after the hell I put rachel through), I've been concerned with my self-conception and self-awareness of love. in other words, [until recently] every time I thought I was falling in love or love was awakened in my heart, I was fooling myself. the image was present without the substance. and so I suffered (from my own hand) anxiety on whether I would ever know the truth of love in my heart.
I think I can report that my anxiety was an intellectual/academic exercise that existed not because my heart was deficient, but simply because I had never fallen in love.
I can say that now because both sheena and I believe that we are falling in love with each other. I find myself hesitant to say how deep or substantive that love is, but this one thing I believe firmly: that we are presently in the act of falling in love, and that deeply. how deep and how substantive I don't think we can say for some time, nor is it important that we have an answer to that. the matter is simple and clear: love from the Source of Love is alive and growing between us, and we trust to His timing for how that grows and deepens. yes!
ok; to the grindstone. [how's that for a transition?]
'madness!'
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